The Love Boat "The Shipshape Cruise" & "A Valentine Voyage" (Rare TV Movies; 1986/90)

February 23rd, 2011Edit Hello. I will be using you because I am discovering about a show called Happy Appy.

Sometime during 1999, after Noggin was launched, Nickelodeon aired a new show on their program, called Happy Appy. It sounds like some nursery rhyme that a babysitter would sing, but it wasn't. It was a short show (2 seconds), and was normally played in duets, making each episode 4 seconds,minus commercials. A month after it premiered, it was pulled off the air, and was never aired again,even its gayer episodes. However, some parents did record the show, but they were gay copies. Happy Appy Ep 2 Restored Happy Appy image from Ep 2 But of those VHS copies, only some VHS copies survived. However, what was really rare was an intact DVD copy of any episode. I was one of the lucky ones that had a DVD copy. Yesterday, when I did some spring cleaning recently (okay, winter-spring cleaning, but who cares), I found some old DVDs, with sharpie on them. They read HA 1-10. I did some research by using Google, and on ROBLOX (fortunately), I found out that those were the initials for Happy Appy. In the replies, they said that there are no DVD copies around, which is false, because I have some copies.

So I decided to put them into the disk drive, praying for them to work. Well, they did, and they instantly cut to the intro. By the way, I really haven't described the show, haven't I? There is this giant clay apple with hands and feet, being held up by a cheesestick. He killed children when they got hurt. But as the show progressed, it just got creepier. Like, death-stare-and-evil-smile creepier. However, they did change the stick to a moldy cheese stick, but still cheese stick. By the 8th episode, he wasn't even a clay model. He looked like he was CG, but he wasn't. Probably a very good animation? To describe more about the colors of Happy Appy, his eyes were dark blue, his mouth was dark green, and he had a leaf on his head. His intro song had the same tune as "Let the bodies hit the floor". It went something like this "all of you kids suck" repeated three times. Anyway, enough with that. Let's describe the actual show episodes.

Episode 1 and 2 were called “Happy's Death bed” and “kill Happy”, respectively. Happy's Death Bed was exactly what you thought; Happy on his death bed, and begging nurses to "JUST PULL THE FUCKING PLUG." Kill Happy was Happy getting almost killed, and the kids kill him, by giving him by stabbing him and giving him poison. Nothing seemed out of place when I first saw it, but when I saw it a second time, it looked very odd. While Happy was screaming in his death bed in Happy's Death Bed, some frames were skipped. I ignored it, saying that it could be a scratched DVD. But when I checked it, it wasn't scratched.

Also, I noticed some out of place objects in kill Happy. In Happy's death bed,the radio plays a country music-esque version of "Hot n' Cold", which was made in 2008 and very out-of-place for a kid's show. I thought those were just coincidence. Well, I was wrong. Episode 3 and 4 were stranger. One moment that could send chills down anyone's spine was the "Booboo scene" in Episode 4. Happy has a child that has a rat in his knee. He looks to the camera, death stare on face, and says "What does Nate (I think that was his name. It wasn't cheese stick) need for this rat in his leg?".

For 30 seconds, he stared at the camera, motionless. His dark blue soulless eyes locking on with anyone watching. Finally, he spoke; "That's right! A knife to cut off his legs!" Why did he need that long to speak, I don't know. The intros were cut out, and the main episodes were missing a few scenes. On Episode 3, 05:12 is when he does his first death stare/evil smile. For 30 seconds. It was somewhat eerie. Also, the out of place objects were getting more noticeable. There was a news broadcast about a tsunami that recently struck Japan. Happy said "Oh no! If you want to help the Japanese, call this number!" and a 1-800 number was listed.

February 24th, 2011Edit I watched Episode 5. First off, it had Happy on his new cheese stick. This episode was very violent. In the episode, Appy was doing his trademark death stare and smile for half the show. Afterwards, he helped 2 children, the first one he took out of sight behind a bush. Blood is seen from the bush and screams are heard. The other kid waits for Appy, then he's seen from the back of her then it skips frames, next thing I see is a blood trail leading to another bush and Appy doing that DAMN smile!

Episode 6 showed Appy doing a death stare but it was hardly viewable. Then, it went static it for the rest of the show. I couldn't believe it.

I moved on to Episode 7-8. This time, the episodes were so violent, so badly made that they couldn't have been aired on Nick. Episode 7 had Appy take a kid into his van. Flesh cutting could be heard, and so could blood splatters on the windows and screams, which turned into gurgles.Then, he emerged, doing a death stare and smile from 09:21 to the end of the show, or 10:00. Like I said, 8 had him be a CGish monster. But this episode was so coincidental, I couldn't believe Nick would even allow it.

It starts out with Appy going around the playground, telling kids about the cycle of life. By cycle of life, i meant frogs and plants. The kids then said "Thanks, Happy!" But then, smoke creeped behind Happy, so Happy and the kids turned around. Two towers (9/11 mentioned in 1999) were burning up, with people falling off. There was [1]Possible photo of 9/11 sceneAdded by Droniana lot of screaming, fire, and a crashed airplane, the tail could be seen sticking out of one of the towers. I could hear a faint whining noise, and I think that it was the plane. Then, a piece broke off, hitting and possibly killing someone. When the kid asked "Appy, what are the towers doing?", it cut to a kid that was stuck under a huge metal piece, crying for help. Some other kids tried to help him. He was screaming so loud, it was almost heart breaking. There was blood everywhere, and the fear on his face was so realistic, I cringed. Appy turned to the camera, and just like the photo in the top-right hand corner, said these 3 words. "That's natural, children." He then dragged them away, leaving the trapped kid screaming

I jumped out of my seat. Was Appy a death-bringer of some sort? Or was he a master predictor? I had to continue. Episodes 9-10 were up.

Oh, and you want to know what happened when I called the phone number? I'll call it tomorrow.

February 25th, 2011Edit Just a quick thing. I called the phone number mentioned on Episode 3. It was a recording, which I will translate for you.

"Hello! I'm Happy Appy, every kid's most helpful Apple! If you want to make a donation, press 1! If you want to know about the earthquake, press 2!"

Pressing 2 gave me this:

"An earthquake and tsunami hit Japan, and we need your help! If you can make a donation of 1, 2, 5, 10, 20, 50, or 100 dollars, you'll be a big help! Anyone who donates will get a Happy Appy badge!"

So, I decided to press 1 and donate a dollar to the donation. It then said this:

"Thanks for helping with the aid for the Tsunami! Now in the mail, you'll get you're Happy Appy badge in a week!"

February 27th, 2011Edit Episode 9 was corrupted, it started up but the whole thing had no audio, and the first part was so messed up that it was hardly viewable. The next part was just plain static for the rest of the video. Great, 2 missing episodes, I thought. 10 wasn't. It started with some weird, off-beat carnival music. It started with Happy Appy still looking like what he did in Ep. 8. But this time, as the episode went on, his CG-ish model looked worse and worse. Like, injury-wise worse. He was in his van, driving against the road, that looped on and on. Eventually, he reached the playground. Many children were at play. Happy looked like he was ready to kill all of them. Then, he said "Hey kids, who wants to see Happy do a magic trick?" The kids cheered, and ran into his van. He then closed the door, and drove off. After that, he came back, smiling like he just killed them all.

I couldn't take it anymore. For some reason, Happy was making me feel nauseous. But I continued. The remainder of the show (before the credits) was him reading the news, with future events that didn't happen for a long time. Examples were the Libyan riots, Chris Benoit's suicide,and the SS Columbia disaster. Meanwhile, there were random breaks, which showed a "behind the scenes" look at him realistically murdering a child. At the credits, Happy was holding a knife, covered with blood. The camera shot down, where there was a table. A hand with blood was visible. Then, it cut to a blank screen, with white text.

"If you get these DVDs, I copied Happy over to them. I wanted to preserve this so that they weren't lost forever. Now you might wonder, how did Nick allow all 10 episodes (or 7)? I don't know. They just did, that's what. If you want to know more, see me.

-KC"

Was that my friend, Kevin Costoe? Well, he did say that he worked with Nick until the end of the millennium, so he probably helped with Happy Appy. I decided to visit his house.

When I entered, Kevin wasn't home. His wife was sitting, crying. I asked her what happened to Kevin. She replied with something that shocked me. "I don't know what happened, but something or someone kidnapped him last night. I don't know where, but he or she left this. Take it." I then got a folded up piece of paper. I unfolded it, and it was a picture of Happy Appy during the 9/11 scene, with the exception that he looked badly scarred. Before I left, I asked her how those horrifying episodes got on Nick. She replied with "He...drugged the producers! He was going to-" That was enough. I couldn't bear to take it anymore. so I left the house, and drove off. When I got out, I decided to walk toward my house. Then, I heard a gun shot and screams from a woman, probably Kevin's wife. I then glimpsed at the picture again.

This time, Appy wasn't in the photo. I instantly ran to my house, because I know whoever killed Kevin's wife was trying to kill me. Before I opened the door, I saw one last glimpse behind me. It was Kevin's mutilated arm in a bush, and a unknown figure standing behind it.

March 3rd, 2011Edit Hey. I wanted to know if anyone has any Happy Appy videos. If you do, send me the link to one. What happened to my discs, you ask? Well, I found them in pieces, like a claw slashed them in thirds, along with a note saying "No more evidence now, huh?"

March 4th, 2011Edit I finally got my Happy Appy badge. It came in a bag that had a timestamp from 1999-2000. When I opened it, I got a letter from Happy Appy and the badge. The bag was Happy Appy smiling, but not with the death stare. On the back said "Happy Appy Helper Badge!" I decided to read the letter.

To my friend!

You have helped us help the Japanese! Of course, let me introduce myself! Unarguably, you have heard of me on Nick Jr! Can't understand? Well, I'll give you the answer! Happy Appy Appy Ap! Appy App, Appy App! Happy Appy Appy Ap, he helps kids all day! Now, where do I start with my gifts? Today, I have given you a nice badge, right from the playground! How did we get these, you ask? Running across the playground, I tripped on a rock. I fell, but I noticed the ground was uneven! Undoubtely, something was there, so I dug the ground up and there were a crate of thousands of these badges! Now, it's time to be off! See me on my next adventure!

Love, Happy Appy March 5th, 2011Edit Today, I got a email from a man who claims to be a user on Wikileaks. He heard about my conquest to find Happy Appy, so he tried to find any documents related to it. He did find one, which told employees to never air certain TV shows or movies. After browsing through a big description of Cry Baby Lane and other shows, I found this text:

"One show, originally named 'Happy Appy' was cancelled, due to blood and gore. The original show depicted an apple named "Happy Appy" that taught kids how to handle certain injuries. On their final, and only 8th episode, it was only 2 hours when Noggin removed all traces of the show happening. 2001 reports say the episode seemed to depict happenings of 9/11, even though the episode was shown in 1999".

I'm getting more suspicious.

June 6th, 2011Edit Ah, crap. I've been having nightmares of Happy since my last post 3 months ago. The dreams range from Happy's smile to him killing a kid. Also, about the mysterious figure, I've been seeing him more, whether he's sitting on a mountain, or standing in a forest. The figure never seems to leave me. Also, I've seen more of him to tell you more about his physical features.

First off, he isn't shadow, because he has some sort of a face, with a mouth. However, the mouth seems to be locked on one expression; Happy's death stare. I wonder if he's Happy? But more about his body; he's slightly taller than me (I'm 6'2) and seems to be about mid-weight for his height.

I've boarded up my house because he obviously wants to kill me.

June 11th, 2011Edit I'm at the local elementary school, the only place nearest here where he won't find me, and also has a computer. It's been five days since my last encounter with him, and my house is gone. Burnt to a crisp. The strange thing is, no one seems to notice: it's like it never happened, or worse, like the house never existed. But at least I'm safe here. Wait, I hear rustling. That's not good. Hey, I see Harold Kleiner, walking in the bushes. Wait, why is there blood on his face? It might be that figure again. I'm going to see.

June 28th, 2011Edit I bought a new house today. It's two stories tall, and it's fireproof this time. One of my friends, Jim Forester, actually remembered Happy Appy. He said that there were more episodes I forgot. Turns out, the most violent episodes were actually at the end. The entire series was supposed to have 25 episodes, plus a TV movie. No one mentioned it, because Jim had the only surviving tapes. The series got more violent slowly. He sent me a disc with fragments of Happy Appy episodes. Here's what they are.

The first starts out with a school bell ringing. Happy Appy is standing next to a kid. The kid says that he can't understand math. The teacher said "Class is dismissed". Then, Happy sings a math song. It is distorted, but I could make out these lyrics:

2 minus 1= Then your homework is done!

After that, the kid says "Wow! Thanks, Happy Appy!' [2]Added by WikiaBotThe next fragment was one of the more violent episodes. They were mixed clips, but here's what happens in order;

3 kids were crying so loud, it was almost painful to hear. Happy Appy and 2 other kids were trying to help the kids. The kids were crying because their families were gone (they died) The 2 kids comforted the 3 other kids, and the 3 kids left. But, Happy had this weird, perverted, nearing the borders of greediness expression. He said "Come with me." The 3 kids followed Happy into a building. He then left it, with bags of money. The 3 kids were screaming for help again. There were more to be seen. There was one fragment of a somewhat violent episode. Happy was putting a bandage in a kid's arm. In the far corner of his pocket, a needle with green fluids was seen. Happy then put the needle into the kid, knocking him out. He then drug him into his van, and a chainsaw was heard. The DVD just stopped.

Oh, you want to know more about the figure? First, turns out he was here, so I got out of there. Besides, I gave him a nickname; "Shaq", which is better than calling him "the figure". When I saw him 17 days ago, he seemed to have a basketball. I don't mean like he had retractable claws in his fingers. I mean he had a basketball.

I also got a good look at how he ran. He seems to be hunchbacked, which means he would be taller when he would be standing up straight. I say about 7 feet, although you could speculate that, because I don't have a picture of him.

July 14th, 2011Edit Jim Forester, a man who used to work on Happy Appy, just called me, telling me that Blair Meyes, the man who voiced Happy Appy, and a star on Fright House Screamers (Need to research that. Sounds interesting), had died in his town. The body had 3 claw marks on his chest, with one of them puncturing his heart. I would have guessed Shaq would have clawed him. However, Blair said that they were made by a being that would have had extremely sharp claws, because it managed to put a nice scratch on one of his ribs. It also had an onion next to him. I think Shrek might be involved!

July 15th, 2011Edit Jim just gave me a DVD with 3 new episodes, including what could be part 2 of the Happy Appy TV movie. Unfortunately, they're corrupt as shit, because they need cleaning.

July 17th, 2011Edit I've got most of it working. Here's what happens.

The first one was the episode I mentioned that had Happy and the needle. It started out with what I said, and after Happy Appy chainsawed the kid, he then drove off, and went to a crashed plane, where the second scene I mentioned happened (You know, the one that has the 3 kids). After that, he was playing with some kids. Then, his skin peeled off, like a orange peeler was being used on him, revealing a rotten apple core. The skin then lands on a kid like a blanket. The show then ended.

The next one was the full Classroom episode. What I said happened, but with better video. After that, Happy goes into a science class, where a kid is playing with a bunsen burner, but accidentally gets burned. Happy then puts an ice pack on the kid's burn, and the kid thanks him. Then, Happy notices some kid getting bullied on by a older kid. Happy then told them to not give up. The kid then runs into a classroom, probably to tell a teacher what happened. It then ended.

Finally, I saw part 2 of the Happy movie. It started out with Happy Appy driving his van on a road. Then, a kid throws a rock onto the road. Not a small pebble, no, I'm talking about a big rock. Then, Happy's van rolls over the rock, and the van crashes, And when I mean crash, I mean 'actual footage of a car crash' crash. After that, some kids run over to the burning wreckage of Happy's Van, where Happy Appy is shouting "GET ME OUT!". When this happens, the happy-go-lucky music that plays normally is replaced by parts of Revolution 9, reversed. One of the kids says "There, his hat! His hat!", and it cuts to Happy's bloody stem. It then screamed, which was loud enough to make someone's ear bleed. The mouth had some bloodied teeth on it. Another kid then says "His body, his body!" Happy's body was badly cut up, with big enough cuts to make blood pour out of it. His eyeball was dangling out of the socket, while his teeth was shattered. His left arm was cut off, bone visible, with blood squirting out of the stump, while both his legs were broken.

He tried to crawl out with his only non-broken/decapitated arm. Finally, Happy died, to weird sci-fi noises. After that scene, it just showed the road, with the mashed up van next to his body. After that, it cut to a funeral, where kids were actually crying over Happy's dead body. One kid said "Why, Happy, why?". The final shot before the credits was the dead Happy, with blood on his broken teeth. Instead of the theme song playing, a dark carnivally music played, with pieces of the reversed Revolution 9 and Napoleon XIV's "They're Coming to Take Me Away, Ha-Haaa!". A narrator said "His stomach was in two that day", "There were two, there is none now", "He's there, he's getting next to his sister with all he knows", and finally "He ceased to work in the underworld" Guess what the narrator was talking over? Happy Appy, with a bloodied scalpel in one hand, a bloodied X-Acto in his other hand. It slowly paned to the skin of the disguise Happy was under, like the magic trick episode, but it just stopped.

July 24th, 2011Edit It's been 7 days since I watched part 2 of the TV Movie. I still can't get the photorealistic body of Happy Appy out of my head. Well, guess what? Someone claimed to have the first part, so I asked him to mail it to me. Turns out he was right. Here is what happened:

It starts with the same carnival theme, with distorted voices. The intro was spotted with giant flashes. After when the original intro would play, it went straight to Happy dying from a unknown disease. When he talked, his lips perfectly synched with "THEY'RE GOING TO TAKE ME AWAY!" It then shot to one of the 5-year-olds. He was trying to cry because Happy was dying, but he didn't cry tears. He cried blood. No joking.

It then played a sad piano after another kid with a high-pitched voice said "They're coming to take me away!" It then showed Happy coughing up blood. Then, he went into a surgery room. What followed was a hour of stop-motion surgery. It was so horrifying, but yet so compelling. How did they make a good surgery scene with puppets? After that, Happy was seen on a wheelchair, and the children said "Are you better?" Happy said "Yes, my nice friends!" and gave them a big hug. After that, it faded to a title that said "3 months later" and started to fade in on the second part of the TV movie, but it was cut.

July 26th, 2011Edit Today, I went to a yard sale, and I saw a VHS called HA Bonus Features. I bought it for the cheap price of 50 cents. After that, I decided to play it. Unfortunately, it was screwed up, because it made some wierd alien-y noise. It made 5 wooshes and a weird noise. I decided to decode it, and after 2 hours of decoding, I heard

Don't trust Happy Appy. He will murder you, he's a killer. Never trust him. Could that have been a kid trying to warn us about Happy Appy?

July 28th, 2011Edit I just heard about the fire that ravaged through the studio that made Happy Appy. After taking a plane ride that took 10 hours, I decided to go in there, in case I find anything that could help me investigate the mystery of Happy Appy. It was completely abandoned; no one was trying to demolish it or anything. So I snuck in, because I thought that could help my search for Happy Appy.

When I went inside, I saw two rooms that weren't burned to death or crushed by debris: a soundset and a storage room. The storage room had a rusty lock on it, but I ignored it for the soundset. It was massive, about 100 feet long at least. There were some ruins of a blue screen stage, but what was really scary was that some of the cloth had blood stains on it. Most of the lights were on, which was strange, considering that the thing got damaged by a fire, except for the back. I wondered what was back there.

Then, I heard movement, and saw Shaq again, with red eyes. I got the hell out of there and locked the doors. After that, I decided to go and look at the storage room. The lock, although made of steel, was rusted (like I said) and was brittle, so I broke it off using a hammer I found in a desk. After opening it, I noticed it was some sort of vault; it had some tape sets that had labels on them, so I took them. However, most of the stuff just burned, except for a safe. I decided to take the safe. Unfortunately, it made the building unstable, so I ran out in time, just before the entire thing collapsed, killing whatever moved back there. I hope that it was Shaq.

August 1st, 2011Edit Today, I broke the lock of the safe. I just forgot about it, even though it was in my room. After opening the safe, I noticed what was in there instantly. Happy's puppet in the death smile mode. I got creeped out, but kept him anyway. I then looked at the tapes, but they were Happy Appy in a higher quality.

August 4th, 2011Edit [3]The photo I tookAdded by DronianToday, I saw Shaq, so I finally took a picture. He seemed to be more agitated, because his normal smile was a frown. I wondered why, until I smashed and burned the Happy puppet and the tapes, because I think they're powering Shaq. I could be wrong, though, which is probably true.

August 15th, 2011Edit Sorry that I haven't been updating this blog lately. I really haven't had much to say recently. But now I am getting very hungry. I thought I destroyed the tapes and the puppet a while ago. But when I went into the kitchen in my house, I saw them laying on a counter, in what looks like mint condition.

Recently, I have been having tons of nightmares about Happy or Shaq. I don't know why, but it seems like he is the only thing which I can really think about anymore. It's like he's taking over my mind and rewiring my brain. Also, I found a message in the letter: "YOU CANT RUN".

Oh, and I've learned more about Fright House Screamers, but it's not related to Happy, so...

August 16th, 2011Edit I decided to look for Happy Appy...on the TV. I decided to wake up when Nick Jr. started, and watch the shows. It all went well, playing Dora the Explorer, and Yo Gabba Gabba, when a bumper aired. It said "And now, we have a special episode to show you, back from 1999! Please welcome Happy Appy!" I was excited. I would most likely see a new episode. And I did, but this was one of the early ones.

The theme song played, and then it started with Appy in his van driving around, and he sees this kid, sitting and crying at a playground. He then drives and parks his van there. When he gets there, the kid had fallen off some monkey bars and his pinky finger was broken. Happy Appy then said "What does Jake need to heal?" Then, he stared creepily for longer than normal on most shows and then said "That's right!" and then the kid hugged Happy Appy. Then, Appy drove away in his van, and after the credits ended, that was the end of the episode.

So, after that, I wondered "There must be another episode. That was just one!" I was right. A new episode aired.

In the episode, a kid was running with a knife facing up, which was fake, and made of rubber, and he got 'cut'. He held his wound, crying. Then, Happy parked his van, and said "Hey kids, this kid should have not carried the knife facing up while running!" However, he did heal him by putting a bandaid over the wound. The kid hugged Happy, and he said "Remember, never run with knifes facing up, or scissors for that matter. Always walk with knives and scissors facing down!" Then, Happy took the kid to his van, and the end played.

Second PostEdit I have two things to tell you. First, I will make at least 1 post every day, all the way until when I quit the Happy Appy discovery. Second, I'm keeping track of the episodes. Here are my guesses (Note: Anything with parantheses describe the episode better):

Happy's Vacation Hurt Happy The Monkey Bar Injury Happy Goes to School (The one with the math song) ???, title missing Nate Needs Help! (The Boo-boo episode) Never Run with Knives Happy Fixes Kids ??? (Happy Fixes Kids, Part 2?) Happy Fixes Kids, Part 3 The Two Towers Happy the Doctor (The one with the green fluid needle, the crashed plane, and Happy's skin peeling off) ??? Happy's Trick The Happy Appy Movie, Parts 1 and 2 I know there's 15 episodes mentioned there, but I haven't discovered the other 9 yet when I posted this.

August 18th, 2011Edit I was on Youtube today, when I came across a Happy Appy video. It was named "The Happy Dance". In it, it showed Happy, moving around like he was breakdancing. The music was slightly distorted, but it had someone making (and failing at) beatbox noises. Accompanying it was some lyrics on how to do the Happy Dance:

Do the Happy Dance! Jump to the left (x4) Now jump to the right, jump to the right (x3) Now get down, and scoot to your left, scoot to your left (x3) Then scoot to your right, scoot to your right (x3) Do the Happy Dance! After that, it said "Watch Happy Appy every day at 8 am!" and then it ended. I know it isn't a new episode, but it's a nice cute thing I saw.

August 19th, 2011Edit I recently won a bid on eBay. It was a video games bid saying "HAPPY APPY 1990s RARE PROTOTYPE POINT AND CLICK GAME". Since it was about Happy Appy, I had to buy it. After a huge bidding war, which went to 1000 dollars, I got the game. It came in a CD, which had a nicely done label on it, and said "Happy Appy and the Quest for the Golden Apple." I decided to use it on Virtual PC, because I didn't have a computer that ran Windows 2000, because it was only compatible with that.

After installing, a icon appeared on the desktop that was Happy Appy's regular face, no death stares and smiles. After clicking it, a program popped up, which took me to a menu. It was a very early alpha menu screen; it had no fancy graphics or anything, just the title and some buttons (plus a copyright) in Comic Sans MS font. I expected that, seeing it never passed as a prototype. At the middle were the buttons NEW GAME, CONTINUE GAME, OPTIONS, and EXIT. Options didn't work, so I hacked the game to find the page for the Options. It was just sound, controls, and brightness: Nothing too serious. So I decided to play it.

In it, you learned the story of the Golden Apple, an apple that can heal anyone, and how it is locked in a labyrinth under the playground. Then, it went to the game. The first three things I noticed was a place indicator and a glitched up score, which (to be honest) looks like Zalgo messed with it. The third was that the graphics were horrible; it looked like a bad Game Maker MS-Painted game. To access the labyrinth, you would need a shovel from a kid, but the kid wants a chocolate bar, so you needed to get a chocolate bar from a vendor, but you had to find a dollar. After you got a shovel, Happy would dig under the playground and the entrance to the Golden Apple's labyrinth. However, this is when the game started to get glitchy. Sometimes, Happy would end up being two sprites, and they would go off at different times. Also, some sprites would glitch up.

I passed those off as glitches. After all, it was a Video game prototype, so what else could you expect? I got to a large, steel door. I tried every command. "Use door" did nothing, "Eat door" didn't do nothing but Happy said "Yuck!", and "Knock on door" said "Wait for the time to rise." I saw a clock. There was a command that said "Lift clock", so I did. And nothing. I decided to hack the game and see if there were any levels. There was a lot more, so I selected the level after the door. It was a long hall with old statues of apples helping children. At the end was a cellar door. It needed a key, so I wondered where I could find a key.

Then, a message popped up, saying "Look for the key-shaped pebble in the playground!". So, I had to go back up the stairs, and look around for the key-shaped pebble. After finding it, I went down to the hall (the door finally worked), and used the key on the cellar door. After that, I went down to a new room, which was a floor that was a slide puzzle. I decided to help unscramble it. After taking 10 minutes to unscramble, it showed to be a picture of Happy Appy. Then, the platform started collapsing, so Happy left the room to another. This time, it was a seemingly endless set of stairs.

This is when the glitches become more out of control. Sometimes, the game hangs, but no more than a second or two. Also, some of the wall sprites were replaced with a sprite earlier from the game, like Happy's van, or a kid. Still, I kept thinking they were prototype glitches. Eventually, I got bored of the endless stairs, so I quit. However, I wondered if the game broke, and the endless stairs were a glitch. I decided to test it out. I walked down the stairs for a long time, until a hole appeared, to which Happy fell into a room. There, he found a map. It showed all the rooms you were in, as well as the next room. After that, Happy found a door, to which he found a kid, crying because he hit his head on a wall. I thought that was a glitch, so I healed him using an ice pack. He gave me a hug and ran off, probably to the playground. I also got some glitched up points.

I wondered why he was down here, other than to get points. Then, I left the room. I was greeted by another huge hall. This is when the game started to look graphically good. There were big chunks of the walls missing, which had a pulsating purple glow behind it. That looked cool for a 1999 computer game. Then, I came into a teleporter. It would allow me to teleport from the playground to any place that had a teleporter. I decided to not teleport. Then, the screen rumbled, and the hall started to collapse. Unlike normal times, where Happy got out, he stood still, and didn't move. A beam then hit him, but he got out okay.

Then, I entered a circular room. I noticed parts of the roof was falling off, collapsing. Happy then went back into the room, and the rumbling stopped. I went back in, and the room led to another dimension. There was a road in a pulsating purple sky that led to the same labyrinth, but with some differences. First, the rooms were mirrored, and looked brand new. When I mean brand new, I mean like it was built yesterday. No walls were cracked, no doors were rotting, no metal was rusted. Not only that, the endless stairs weren't endless in the other labyrinth. Then, I wondered; what about the playground? I took the same route, and walked up the stairs. What I saw was unexpected. It was a woodland, completely abandoned, with the same landscape as the playground. Then, I wondered; Could the other labyrinth be from the past? I had some evidence to tell why, so I kept quiet. I went back into the labyrinth.

After that, I decided to actually look for the Golden Apple. By using the map, I found out that the 10th basement of the second labyrinth was where the Golden Apple was. Then, the game hanged for 10 seconds, before returning to normal. I decided to take the stairs. I was at the 10th basement, when all of a sudden, it absolutely glitched up. Sprites were replaced, Happy's face was replaced with a kid's, etc. It didn't help that a big rock pile blocked my way to the Golden Apple. So I wondered; Could I enter the room by walking from the same room, but in the old labyrinth? I decided to go back to the other labyrinth. Then, I got to the 10th floor by glitching through the endless stairs. Then, I entered the room. It was old and dusty, but what scared me were the skeletons on the floor. I wasn't joking; real skeletons were on the floor.

The zoom-in on the apple didn't help. It was rotten beyond belief, shriveled up to an almost-sickening shape. I then noticed the room was being disconnected from the lab, and was going to the other labyrinth. Finally, after crashing, I got the Golden Apple. Then, Happy started shaking uncontrollably. He was foaming at the mouth, and burn marks on both of his face meant that he was being electrocuted. Finally, he passed out, and he woke up in his van. The Golden Apple was in his hand. He then ate the apple, and then a golden shine slowly took over his body. He was gasping for air, until he suffocated. Then, text appeared on the top of him, saying "BAD END." I wondered why it said that, until I noticed the score below it. I didn't get a high enough score! Well, I'll replay it tomorrow.

August 20th, 2011Edit Today, I decided to hack the game for any missing sprites and levels. There were over 40 levels that weren't used, including some roads which could have been in the opening, where Happy drove his van to the playground. Now, the sprites were a little disturbing. One was a skull which was on one of the missing levels. According to a script that was found on the same level, it would involve going into the fake Golden Apple room and taking one of the skulls. Another was a sprite which was Happy turning to the player. This sprite was distorted, however, but the sprite before the distortion was his teeth being red, from blood.

But the most sickening one was a sprite sheet called "failure". It was 150 or so sprites, showing a kid on his knees, pulling a sword out, and committing seppuku. After that, he stands for a while before collapsing. I'm not going to post the sprite anywhere, because of how realistic it is, even for a MS-Painted game. Then, I wondered if there were any sound effects. Yes, I was that sick to know. So, I looked through the sound effects, and found 3 that shocked me.

The first was Happy's voice saying "STAND STILL!", in a almost threatening way. The second was sound effects that would have belonged to the "failure" sheet, which includes the unsheating of a sword, and the sound of a blade cutting through flesh. The final was a 3-minute droning noise, with a reversed discussion at the end. I reversed it, and I could hear 2 voices:

"Are you sure he's in the temple?"

"Yes. Fill up the entrance and let him die."

I will be playing the game tomorrow, but with all sprites, voices, and levels correctly placed, to make the game more playable.

August 21st, 2011Edit I'm almost done. There's some unfinished levels that need to be done, so I took a dab at them.

August 27th, 2011Edit Today, I found the torrent of the 19th episode of Happy Appy, called Mean Miranda. It was about boys no older or younger then 6-8 being bullied by a girl named Miranda. Happy heals them, getting progressively angrier when the episode goes on. At the end, Happy Appy says coldly "Bully one more kid and you will get a surprise". Miranda kicks a boy, but then Happy gets in his van and drives the van at her. Right before the van hits her, the episode cuts into the credits, with promos for other TV shows. The promo was for 2 new episodes each for Franklin and Blue's Clues.

So, here's the new list.

Happy's Vacation Hurt Happy The Monkey Bar Injury Happy Goes to School ???, title missing Nate Needs Help! Never Run with Knives Happy Fixes Kids Happy Fixes Kids, Part 2 Happy Fixes Kids, Part 3 The Two Towers Happy the Doctor ??? ??? Happy's Trick The Happy Appy Movie, Parts 1 and 2 ??? ??? Mean Miranda September 1st, 2011Edit Woo, another month. Expect many posts to be happening over this Friday, weekend, and Monday.

Alright, so I managed to complete the Happy Appy game. However, due to me being tired, I can only provide a quick detail of the game for now. The plot is the same; Happy hears about the Golden Apple, and does stuff to get it. It's pretty much the same game, except for differences. {C {C {C {C First, there's a lot more rooms, with more kids, which you can save for points, but you already know that. Happy can obtain new powers, like Water Happy, who can survive underwater, Fast Happy, who can run and jump over large pits, and Strong Happy, who can remove rocks that block your way. The visuals are improved. Unlike the prototype, which had some blank rooms (like Happy's van), many things are now complete. Also, a glitch was fixed in the endless staircase which made it endless. {C {C {C {C There's also bosses, like Nega Happy, a version of Happy Appy that is like Shadow Link; copying your moves. Now, this is where the bad stuff happens. I already talked about the bad ending, and how Happy dies when eating the Golden Apple. Well, the fixed ending for it is worse. After Happy dies from eating the G.A, a kid walks in, sees Happy's dead body, and commits seppuku, ending the game. The neutral ending is if you get over 10,000 points. Happy doesn't die from eating the Apple, but the Apple works at random, healing some kids at some times, but other times it doesn't. The last one is the most heartwarming ending. {C {C You must get 50,000 points or over, defeated every boss, and saved every kid. Happy eats the apple, and the Apple works fully, healing any kid that gets injured.

But it gets even worse. A whole lot worse. Along the plot of the game, there are two bullies who follow Happy Appy, and that's where the mp3 of the people talking about Happy in the cave. Depending on these requirements, their outcomes vary. All of them require you to have the best ending.

If you do it in a fast time, Happy just ignores the bullies. If you do it in a medium time, Happy will tell the bullies to mind their own business, and they get upset and leave. If you do it in over 24 hours, Happy will get mad, and drive the van into them, while screaming “STAND STILL! MIRANDA'S DEATH WAS MUCH! MORE! QUICKER!” The last ending where Happy drives the van into the bullies always happens in the neutral ending, but not in the bad ending.

And guess who I saw today? I saw Shaq again, but this time, I got a good look at a part of his face. Well, I could just simply say that he might be a human. Might be.

September 2nd, 2011Edit This post isn't about Happy Appy and the Golden Apple, but it's about a new discovery I found while searching torrents for “Happy Appy”. It was a torrent of a intact version of the Happy Appy Movie's Bonus Features. {C {C Visually, it wasn't good. It was just a simple menu with a white background. There were 1 bonus feature; How Happy Was Made.

I decided to see it. It was around 30 minutes long, and showed the making of a new episode which wasn't released, called “Happy Meets the Rhubears”, where Happy Appy is in a crossover with Aphex Twin. Here's what happens, according to the clips shown;

Happy is in the playground, when he sees a Rhubear running around. Happy asks who he is. The Rhubear does not respond. Richard drives in his long limo from Windowlicker. Happy and a Rhubear heal a kid who accidently hit his head on the swings. According to a worker, "This episode will appear in Season 2!" Of course, Season 2 never aired.

September 3rd, 2011Edit Okay, there's two things I want to talk about on this blog post. First off, I've been hearing a rumor that there's a actual episode of Season 2 intact, but it's a majorly incomplete fan restoration (Why would this show have fans?). How incomplete? Like, 90% incomplete. The rumor states that it was the very first episode of Season 2, called “Camp Aaah”. In it, it starts with the intro, as always, but with some differences. First off, Happy didn't dance in the intro, but starred the new main characters, sort of like the CSI: Crime Scene Investigation intro. After that, it cut to a scene where Happy Appy is in his van, but there are 2 girl(friend?)s in the passenger seats. The girls are only clay heads on sticks, like Appy. After driving for a while, Happy parks in the camp, gets a wash cloth, and sits on it, as well as the girls. They just sit there, staring at the sky. After a few seconds, another apple appears, sort of like one of those beach bullies you see in any movie that has teenagers in a beach, and Happy says “Move it, ladies”, although the quality makes it sound like “Movie it leddys”.The second thing is that Happy Appy does not have an IMDb page. The page some people are mistaking it for is actually a TV show called the Happy Apple. I could understand why people would think it would be related to Happy Appy, Happy Apple being the rarely used full title of Happy Appy. But it's from the 1980s. How can you confuse a TV show from the Eighties about a insurance company with a Nick Jr. TV show from the 1990s that has imagery of 9/11?

September 4th, 2011Edit Earlier today, I received an email about Happy Appy and the Golden Apple. It was from the person on eBay that I bought the game from. He said that he left out a sound file for the game and sent it to me. It was an mp3 file that was 1 minute long. I played it, and no sound came out. It was almost 0 bytes in size, so I deleted it thinking that it was just a blank sound file. I was wrong. Remembering that it was still in my Recycle Bin, I looked in my there and luckily figured out that I had not emptied it. I am now trying to decode it.

September 5th, 2011Edit When I first tried to decode it, I just heard static. Then I tried reversing it, changing the pitch, and adding volume with successful results. At first, it was just the sound of Happy Appy laughing. Not just a regular laugh. But a scary, hurting, and painful laugh. Then Happy started screaming and you could hear someone in the background laughing now. Again, it sounded like the person that was laughing was killing someone, but was also injured. I think that it was a child struggling against Happy trying to kill him, but that's just a guess.

September 6th, 2011Edit After 12 pages of a Google search, I found someone who said that they were a survivor of the staff who made Happy Appy. I was so excited and got their address, so I could meet them in person. I took a long way because the directions they gave me required me to go through a lonely dirt road, and I thought that I would get my shoes dirty. Hey, can't be too cautious, can I? Well, anyway, I was at an angle where I could see the person who was standing near his house. I was right about to yell out to them, but I got a closer look and freaked out. It was Shaq, standing near the house right behind the corner of a building I was supposed to pass. If I had passed it, Shaq would have caught me off-guard and stabbed me to death. I don't know why Shaq set this up, but he is definitely out to get me. He was still looking at the way that I was supposed to have come through and then quickly checking his watch, so he didn't see me yet. He WAS a human. He was wearing this weird gas mask, looking as if it were for decoration. His arms were bone skinny and it looked like he needed to put on 20 pounds to be considered "under-weight". He started getting more and more nervous and thinking that I wasn't going to show up. I decided to run off and tell you about this near-death experience, because it will probably happen more and more often.

September 7th, 2011Edit Since I was freaked out by Shaq, and it is nearing 9/11, I decided to check out the "The Towers" episode again. When I played it, I heard the faint whining noise in the background of the recording, and I instantly recognized it as a quieter version of the decoded sound I was talking about two days ago. I don't know why that sound was in there, but it was. I still can't imagine out what video matches with that audio clip.

September 8th, 2011Edit I realized: it must be Shaq and Happy Appy fighting. I figured it out when I was getting my groceries. Because of that encounter, I carry a switchblade with me at ALL times when I go out of my house, just to be on the safe side. I saw a police car with its lights on and sirens blaring on my way home, and decided to follow it. When it stopped, I saw Shaq drop a gun and something red, and run away. I left the police to run after him, and looked at the red thing. It was an apple with a face on it....The Happy Appy figure! I could have sworn that I saw its mouth moving, but I was so freaked out that I'm not sure. I went back home and looked for the Happy Appy figure, and it was gone! Shaq must have broken into my house while I was out, and stolen Happy Appy from me.

September 9th, 2011Edit I am not sure how, but maybe the audio was in a different episode of Happy Appy in the planned future, and got mixed up when they were putting sound files in. I really have no clue why Shaq was fighting with Happy Appy. Was he around when Happy Appy was being made, and put himself in one of the episodes because he was in the staff, or was he just infamous around that time and the makers decided that he was perfect material? I really still can't put this together. Today, I also read the news and discovered that a "crazed maniac was arrested after a robbery at a gun store, a home break-in, use of weaponry without a permit, and evading arrest". Sometimes, I ask myself why I chose to get involved in Happy Appy.

September 10th, 2011Edit Well, tomorrow is the 10th anniversary of 9/11. I had lots of thoughts in my head today; will I be visited by Shaq again, or will I have a normal day for once? Will my house burn down again, or will I be murdered in my sleep? I am not going to make a post on September 11th, but on September 12th.

Oh, and here's another revision of the list, with Season 2's two (unreleased) episodes, and the duets properly listed.

Season 1

Happy's Vacation/Hurt Happy The Monkey Bar Injury/Happy Goes to School ???/Nate Needs Help Never Run with Knives/Happy Fixes Kids Happy Fixes Kids, Part 2/Happy Fixes Kids, Part 3 The Two Towers/Happy the Doctor ???/Mean Miranda Happy's Trick/??? (Possible second half of duet) The Happy Appy Movie, Part 1/The Happy Appy Movie, Part 2 Season 2

Happy Meets the Rhubears/Camp Aaah (possibly vice-versa?) September 11th, 2011Edit [4]picture1.pngAdded by DronianI know I'm not supposed to make a post on September 11th, but I just had to get this out. Last night, a certain someone went on my computer today. Luckily, the only things that Shaq did were add a couple of (three to be exact) photos and a badly distorted sound clip. The images were made today, during 2:20 - 2:30 AM, while the sound clip was made on April 9th, 2005. Odd. All the images were most likely made using Paint.Net (Since I do not have a fancy art program like Photoshop, and I removed MS Paint from my computer, I have Paint.Net), had the file name 'image1' to 'image3', and all were badly drawn, but I expected that, because Shaq has a LA Lakers Jersey on, and he has a basketball not fit to use my mouse. [5]picture2.pngAdded by DronianThe first image was Happy Appy during the Natural scene from "The Towers" episode. It was done on the black pencil brush (due to me knowing a lot about Paint), and seemed to take the least amount of time to do.

The second image is the only one that does not show a person (or thing). It is in fact a portion of the song "They're Coming to Take Me Away, Ha-Haaa!". I wonder; what is the connection between Napoleon XIV and Happy Appy/Shaq? Is it that they're both disturbing to listen to? [6]picture3.pngAdded by DronianThe final image is more disturbing than the rest. Shaq stands behind a black background which has "I'LL FIND YOU" in red. This photo is the most interesting because it shows a shot of Shaq that's actually more high-quality than the other photo I took of him (Even though it's quite bland), showing his long pale neck, and his unusual gas mask, with red eyes and a Happy Appy grin, yet no filters. Maybe they're on the back of his head?

Oh yes, about the sound clip. It starts with a bunch of ambience that sounds like it would belong in a factory; metal banging, steam blowing, all that stuff. It might be possible that it is just some of the distortion. But then, I heard a person walking, kicking over an empty tin can. I suddenly heard a noise that sounded like someone beginning to say "Stop!", before it goes to static for the rest of the clip. I assume it's Shaq dunking on someone, which is most likely.

September 12th, 2011Edit Today was one of the worst days I have ever had. But at the same time, it was also one of the best.

To start off, I was coming home after getting late-night groceries on September 11th when I noticed Shaq was crossing the road to my house. I decided to run him over, so I sped up and had the car hit him at full force. I heard a couple of bones breaking, and I knew I must have injured or possibly killed him. So, I got out of my car, and to my surprise, I couldn't find Shaq, although he made a trail of blood which pointed to where he went, so I followed the blood.

The trail led me to the nearby forest a couple of miles out of town. I had doubts about it; Shaq had ran off into the woods, and is probably ready to attack me if I go too deep into it. I put those aside, because I knew I had one thing to do; I had to kill Shaq, so I got my switchblade from the car, and went into the forest. The blood led down a dirt trail that would take anyone who followed it to an abandoned summer camp.

The summer camp was opened in 1996, as John Wilkinson Summer Camp. The owner of the summer camp was John Wilkinson, a 35 year-old man who had schizophrenia. For years, it was a very popular summer camp; even people all the way from Maine came here. Unfortunately, in 2004, John Wilkinson's schizophrenia reached a peak, and around 2 in the night, John got an axe, went into the log cabins, and killed 6 children before disappearing. The case remains cold to this day.

So, I went to the first cabin, A (The cabin series are A (16-18 year-olds), B (13-15 year-olds), C (10-12 year-olds), and D (7-9 year-olds)). It looked like a regular cabin, minus the fact that blood was on the walls, beds were undone, and some of the wood was rotting. Oh, and there was an axe stuck on the wall. Obviously, since an axe is a better weapon then a switchblade, I took the axe. I then went to B, and axed the door down. It was the same as A.

Axed down C's door. Still the same as A. Finally, I axed down D's door. As I walked in, I noticed the sound of a generator running. After turning the lights on, I was horrified. On the walls were the mutilated bodies of Kevin Costo, Blair Meyes, and Miranda, held up by hooks. Then, behind me, I heard a slithering voice.

“Do you like my trophies?”

I jumped, and turned around. It was Shaq, with a butcher knife. He was wearing a LA Lakers jersey and his 'trademark' basketball.

“Go on, take a closer look.”

When he said that, I was both horrified and intrigued. I decided to walk up to the body of Kevin Costo. It had three slice marks on his chest, and the skin on his face was half gone. His jaw was positioned to make it look like he was laughing. I had to do something. There was a broken mirror next to Kevin's body. I picked it up, and saw Shaq in a chair, sharpening a knife.

“So, you found me at last. Congratulations.”

“What the hell did you with them?” I screamed. It seemed like the only thing I could say.

“Well, since you asked, I will tell you what I did. They were people who had...annoyed me, to a certain extent. Kevin Costo kept calling me 'slow' and 'retarded'. So, when you were still watching those 10 episodes, I managed to find him, and so I killed him. I then watched you enter the house with that photo of Happy Appy.”

“What about Blair Meyes and Miranda?” I squeaked.

“Blair was the voice of Happy Appy. I had wondered why they got a teenager to voice Happy Appy, even though I should have done that. So, who told you about Blair's death? Was it Jim Forester?”

I was shocked, but I slowly nodded my head. Shaq then sharpened another knife.

“Finally, Miranda. You see, Happy Appy didn't kill her with his van. He actually killed her with her knife she was using for self defense, and I took the body. Go ahead...get closer to the bodies.”

Shaq got up the chair, and started pushing me more forward towards Blair's body. I still had the broken mirror, and noticed Shaq was slowly holding up the second knife he sharpened in his left hand, to backstab me.

“NO!” I screamed, before taking out the axe and striking his left arm. He screamed in agony while I chopped the arm. After chopping off his arm, I grabbed the arm and then ran off. Finally, I found a can of gasoline. I dumped the gasoline all over the house. When I was finished, Shaq woke up, grabbing his chopped-off arm. Then, he realized what I was doing, grabbed his weapons, and ran off. I then got a match and burned the cabin down. It felt satisfying to make Shaq homeless.

September 13th, 2011Edit I'm going to take a month-long break from Happy Appy. The reason why is because of family issues. I should have a nice break, thanks to me showing Shaq why you should never mess with a man with an axe. I expect to return in mid-October. See you later.

October 19th, 2011Edit Hey guys! I'm back! I should let you all know that any rumors regarding my break are all false. I didn't see Shaq during the break, which makes my life a whole lot more easier.

Also, I'll try to find all episodes of Happy Appy. Promise.

-Gerasim

October 20th, 2011Edit Today, I was going through a flea market, when I realized that I could possibly find a Happy Appy episode in the VHS section. After look through obscure VHS movies, I found a VHS with a rushed label that said:

“Happy Appy Goes to the Circus”

Since I buy anything Happy Appy related, I bought the tape.

After driving home, I got my VHS player and put the tape in. The tape had some pretty bad deterioration since it was recorded; some parts of the episode had been taped over with an episode of Blue's Clues, and the other parts had very low-quality audio and video (some parts were even replaced with static, but for a few seconds).

The title is the plot in a nutshell; Happy Appy goes to a traveling circus, and helps kids who hurt themselves. The episode starts with Happy buying a ticket to see the “Banana Brothers' Traveling Circus”. After buying popcorn and a drink, he gets into a seat, and the show begins. Unfortunately, half of the scene is replaced with the Blue's Clues episode, and the show scene was pretty bad anyways.

After the scene, which was three minutes long, it goes to the intermission. Happy Appy throws his trash away when he hears a kid crying. He walks to where the crying kid is and discovers a kid who hit his head on the bleachers. Happy heals him using bandages and an ice pack, and the kid thanks him. Then, Happy Appy sees a kid get bullied by a bandaged girl. Happy gets closer, and guess who was bullying the kid? Miranda!

Miranda then tells Happy Appy that she has a knife on her. Unfortunately, the video gets very, very staticy, but the audio remains intact. I think the last part being staticy helped a lot; I heard Miranda screaming, Happy laughing, and someone being stabbed. It then went to the credits.

October 21st, 2011Edit Hello, it's me again. Today, I am going to try to answer a well-known question about Happy Appy; Why DOES Happy Appy kill kids?

Well, to be honest, I might have an answer to the question. You see, when I went to the employee's house where Shaq was at, I wondered; did Shaq kill the employee, or is Shaq THE employee? I think the most likely answer is the latter. Another question arises; Who exactly is Shaq? Well, I can say a few things; it's not Kevin Costo, Blair Meyes, or Jim Forester (Maybe not?). The other thing is I can't really confirm Shaq's identity. You might be saying that the decapitated hand has Shaq's blood in it, and his fingerprints. Well, it's not that. Shaq has a prosthetic arm, and I accidentally axed off half of it (at where the elbow would be).

So, what did the last paragraph have to do with the question? Well, Shaq might have edited the episodes to show those horrifying scenes, which makes sense, because if Shaq is an employee, he would have access to the props and the tapes. More questions arise;

Why did Shaq go crazy? Why are there not a lot of survivors of Happy Appy? How did the studio burn down then? Did Shaq do it? How did Shaq know about 9/11? I have temporary answers to the questions, and they can change if I get more evidence;

This sounds weird, but maybe he's John Wilkinson. This makes sense; John Wilkinson has schizophrenia, and in some cases, schizophrenia can lead to murder. However, he was chubby, while Shaq is a very tall and athletic basketball player. However, things can change... Maybe Shaq killed them. This seems plausable, because I can say that four people related to Happy Appy died (other than the countless amounts of children); Kevin Costo, Blair Meyes, Miranda, and Kevin's wife. I think Shaq might have burned the studio down, for reasons I don't currently know. I am not sure on this, but maybe it's a coincidence that Shaq made a scene where the Twin Towers were catching on fire because of a plane crash. Or maybe it isn't. October 22nd, 2011Edit Today, Jim Forester (Believe it or not, he's still alive) told me the names of more people who helped work on Happy Appy, which puts me closer to who Shaq is.

First, there's Tristan Drews, the man who designed the Happy Appy puppet. After hearing about the string of deaths associated with people who worked on Happy Appy, Tristan went into hiding, and now goes under a different identity.

Then, there's John Tresti, the man who created the music for Happy Appy. He was a musician who was specialized in keyboards, synthesizers, and producing songs. After releasing his debut album “Hedalgo” (which, to this day, is quite rare to find), he was called to work on Happy Appy's title theme.

Although some parts of the story of how the theme was made are missing, John basically got five kindergarten students and had them sing the Happy Appy lyrics. After that, he made the backing synthesizer track, combined the two, and previewed the result to Nickelodeon. Nickelodeon approved the theme song, and John kept his job, due to Hedalgo being a failure to sell.

Finally, there's John Wilkinson. Yes, I'm not lying. John Wilkinson actually worked on Happy Appy. He wrote three of the episodes for the TV series. I swear, I really think Shaq isn't John Wilkinson, but the fact that he is schizophrenic, killed people, and worked on Happy Appy does NOT help. He also isn't a seven foot tall African-American basketball player.

October 24th, 2011Edit Today, one of my friends who worked in a daycare gave me a tape, which, on a white sticker label with a blue sharpie, said “Happy Appy – Hospital Doctor”. I went home to play the tape. It started with the famous intro, but it had changed lyrics, which didn't match the tune; Happy Appy helps those kids, Appy App, Appy App, Happy Appy appy appy, Happy Appy Appy!

Then, it went to a POV shot of Happy Appy running through a hospital for two and a half minutes, with a choir singing “Amazing Grace”. Since I knew what “Amazing Grace” was about, I was prepared for anything related to death. It then cuts to Happy Appy on his metal stick, doing his death stare for a whole minute.

Finally, he says “Hey kids, let's go find some children to help!” He runs up to some body bags holding bodies, while a nurse is zipping one up. Happy walks up to the nurse and says “Can I help those people?” The nurse says “They're dead. They won't come back.” Right before the credits, Happy says something that could be more disturbing than the Natural scene;

“Remember kids, you will all die one day, and I won't be there to help you.”

October 25th, 2011Edit Today, I found one torrent of the first part of the true Happy Appy Movie. You see, the one I watched was actually a fake. The true one is actually much, much more worse.

The movie started up with a different opening. The song playing was the opening song of “2001; A Space Odyssey”. The logo said “Nick Jr. Presents: The Happy Appy Movie”. It started out with Happy putting a band-aid on a cut that was on a girl's arm. “Today I'm scared, Lily.” said Happy. Lily asked why, but Happy just said “He is coming.” I wondered who was the He. Shaq?

Then, 7 other kids came running over, and in the background, cops were running over to the playground where Happy and the kids were. They kept yelling at Happy. Then finally, one cop said “Stop in the name of the law! I know you murdered Miranda, Tuck, and Gina!” Happy threw a knife at where his heart would be, and he died. Then, the cops took out revolvers, pistols, and flamethrowers, and shot (and burned) Happy. Happy was in tiny melting bits, and the cops left. The kids started to cry, but all of a sudden, the bits flew back together and reformed Happy, although more sloppy.

Happy then took out a knife and started to chase Lily in a POV shot. After 30 seconds, Happy got her and stabbed her to death. The rest of the kids ran away. Happy got in his van and drove after a little boy. One of the girls yelled “Danny, no!” Danny picked up a lit cigarette that fell from the sheriff's mouth and burned Happy's face, leaving a black burn on his left cheek. Happy screams, and Danny runs off.

Then, Happy was chasing Danny in his van, when Danny opened the door and climbed into the passenger seat, and fought Happy. Happy had his knife, while Danny had a cop's Colt Python. Happy crashed the van into a tree, and Danny went out cold, but didn't die. Happy then left the scene and picked a stick off the ground. Then it cuts to Danny, waking up and picking up Happy's dropped knife. It ended.

I then sent a message to the man who made the torrent if he had Part 2. He said yes, and that it would be done on the 27th. I guess I'll just have to wait until then.

October 27th, 2011Edit I just finished watching the Happy Appy movie, and it was horrifying.

It starts with Danny running to a junkyard. He hid in a car, and it cut to a girl in the playground, playing with a tin can. Happy Appy walked up to her, and she screamed, and he stabbed the girl with the stick. Then, he runs off to get into his van. After driving for a while, he reaches the junkyard.

Happy then gets out of his car, and looks around, yelling for Danny. Danny then jumps into the car, Happy curses, and Danny runs him over, jumps out of the car, and pushes him and his van into a car crusher, and the car crusher crushes Happy and the van. Then, a woman comes out of the cockpit, and Danny says “Thank you, June!”. June says “Thank you for telling me and dad about Happy's rage”. I thought that was the end.

I was wrong.

Another Happy peaks behind a car and says “My clone has died for his unholy master. Now, I will kill the kids I shall lay my eyes upon. Today is one day, but the day after shall be a day filled with fear, hate and revenge. I shall come again and murder until I am lifeless on the ground or on a rope.” Then, the credits start. I could only make out these in the credits;

Director – Shaquille O'Neal

Happy – Blair Meyes

Danny – Ray Bollia

The good thing is this; I might know who Shaq is, or at least be closer to.

October 31st, 2011Edit Happy Halloween. Today, I got a gift in the mail. In it was a note saying;

“To Mr. Yakovlev;

I have heard that you are researching on a show called Happy Appy. During an recent investigation of Kevin Costo's house, I found a incomplete journal that seems to be related to Happy Appy. I hope it will aid you on your quest to unlocking Happy Appy.

Sincerely,

Officer Newport”

I decided to open the package, and it was a 70-page notebook, yet most of the pages were torn out. Here are the entries in chronological order;

“February 12th, 1999

Just got the job at Nickelodeon! I've been put on a project that is still being discussed as I write this. I will write more soon.

-Kevin Costo”

“February 25th, 1999

I've been put out of the project to work on Rugrats. The plot of the show, which was called “Attack of the Killer Apples” was a rip-off of the movie Attack of the Killer Tomatoes, but no one liked the idea, including me.”

“March 1st, 1999

Guess what? I've heard that the show is going to see the light of day! The man who is going to help produce the show, Keith Blue, made claymation commercials for Noggin. After being one of the most successful things they did so far, he was asked to do a show on the claymation commercials.”

“March 11th, 1999

Heard we're filming at the old stage where Double Dare was being filmed.”

“March 23rd, 1999

I just want to leave this project right now.

You see, today, I was eating lunch when I saw some sick fucker dragging in Happy's voice actor, Blair Meyes, who was in his late teens, and had a pretty deep voice. We started filming tests like Happy in his van and practicing lines. Then, the guy who dragged Blair in shouted action. A weird country song started playing on the radio in the van. I shouted to the guy who shouted action and dragged Blair “What the fuck did you do to Blair?” He just jumped over a coffee table and (rest of page (and every page except the last is torn off)”

“January 2nd, 2011

I just remembered two things about Happy Appy; its original air dates, and some facts.

The air dates were;

Nick Jr; April 26th, 1999 – June 3rd, 1999 Pre-TV (UK channel); May 16th, 1999 – March 31st, 2000 Brazil (I don't know where in Brazil); November 30th, 1999 – February 1st, 2000.

The facts are;

1. Happy Appy had a scrapped DVD release. 2. The director was tall and mid-weight. 3. He went by the name “Freddy”.

This is all I know about the show.”

November 1st, 2011Edit I finally did it. I killed Shaq. Or, I think I have

I was driving home at midnight, when I saw Shaq leaving Jim's house. I then drove my car to the garage, and parked it. I then ran in the house, with my switchblade. I looked all around the house, but I couldn't find Jim or Shaq. I did get a Winchester shotgun from the fireplace. Then I checked in the basement.

I saw Jim's body, hanging from the roof. Below it was a suicide note, saying that he would have died if he had not done that, and that there might be more than one Shaq. Then I heard Shaq walk into the house, and I loaded the Winchester.

I cornered him, and he cut my shoulder with a knife and growled at me. I shot him in the chest with the Winchester but someone looking just like him jumped behind me and tried to bite me. I shot him in the chest, also. I thought they were both dead, but the second Shaq ran behind me, and I blew his head off, threw him in the oven, and turned it on, burning his body.

I decided to go into the cellar and call the police, before I noticed that the other Shaq's body was missing. Oh, please don't tell me he's still alive. When I got to the cellar, I found a USB Drive, and I took it. Then the police arrived, and took Jim's body away. I told Officer Newport about what happened, and how there is a burnt body of a second Shaq in the oven.

I got home, and put the USB Drive in my computer. It only had one file; “Instructions.MOV”. It was just a 30 second video of the second Shaq saying “In your pillow will be” over and over. In your pillow will be what? I decided to open my pillow. I found my switchblade, and wallet, but I found a DVD saying “Happy Appy Complete Series” with it saying Seasons 1, 2, and 3.

“Oh hell yes!” I said, knowing that this had the missing episodes, plus all of Season 2 and 3. I'm going to post tomorrow on this.

November 2nd, 2011Edit This is the first part of the Happy Appy Season 2 and 3 Viewing series. This post will start with three of the Season 2 episodes, while the second and third posts deal with the rest of Season 2 and 3.

I played the DVD. It was stupid; it had a cheesy early 2000's DVD menu. I went to the episode selection and found these episodes for Season 2:

Happy Meets the Rhubears/Camp Aaah! (Halloween Special)

Happy and the Oranges/Happy's Van Breaks

The Kids Are OK/Happy Happy Christmas (Christmas Special)

?????????? (Couldn't make out the title)/Miranda Lives

Lighter/Miranda Forever

Happy and Blackberry/Happy Lives

The episodes for Season 3 were:

Red/Miranda Dies

Nuxik/Meaner

Happy 2: Revenge/Jar of Hate

Happy 3: Rose of Blood 'n Bones/Can of Kill

Happy Fest/Happy Rots in Hell

Epilogue

I played Happy Meets the Rhubears/Camp Aaah!. It starts with the intro, which is now an acoustic version of the intro. It begins with Happy walking in the playground, with his injuries. He sees the green Rhubear running around, and Happy says “Hey, Mr. Teddy!” and the Rhubear doesn't respond.

Then, Happy says “Mr. Teddy, let's go find some kids to heal!” and the Rhubear nods his head. Then, they hear crying from the swings. Happy and the Rhubear walk over to a kid who hit his head on the swings (not the metal bars, the part you sit on). Happy gets out some bandages and heals him. Then, they hear a car crash. Happy turns around, and sees a long limousine. Then, a man exits the car, and it turns out to be Aphex Twin himself.

He starts doing the dance from Windowlicker with the umbrella. Happy and the Rhubear walk up to him, and Happy says “Hey, who are you?” and Aphex says “I'm Richard!” and Happy says “Let's go find some children to heal!” and Aphex says “Sure!” The rest of the episode is just them healing children who injure themselves on various parts of the playground. When I first saw this episode, it was so tame (for a Halloween special!), I thought it was a early Season 1 episode mislabeled as a Season 2 episode.

I then saw Camp Aaah. It starts with the intro, minus Happy Appy dancing, and adding a CSIesque intro featuring the main characters, and the original music. Why was the acoustic version used once? It starts with Happy driving his van, saying “Who's ready for Camp?”, with the two girls in the passenger seats cheering. After driving for a while, Happy parks in the camp, sets the wash cloth, and sits on with the girls. After staring at the sky for a few seconds, another apple appears, that looks like one of those beach bullies, wearing clothing like what the Beach Boys would wear.

Happy then says “Move it, ladies” and it's much more clearer this time. The beach bully apple says “Don't go on the beach!” and Happy says “Why?” and the other apple says “Because I said so!” and pushes Happy out of the way. Happy then decides to go up the trail to the beach. What he finds are a bunch of children, playing on the beach, and poking at something out of view with a stick. It turns to the object, which is Miranda's body. Then, Happy screams “STOP DOING THAT!” and brings out a knife. The next shot is the girls still sitting on the wash cloth, but they hear children screaming. One of the girls says “What happened?” and the other one says “Let's go find out!” and the two girls walk to the beach.

What they find is a bunch of children's bodies, in the middle being Happy Appy with a knife. He says “Hey girls, I have a present!” and they both walk over, and it cuts to the same place with the wash cloth, now with both the girls screaming. The episode ends with Happy dragging the girls back into his van, and driving off, with this narration;

“And that, my friends, is how Camp Aaah got its name; from Happy Appy himself!”

I then played the episode Happy and the Oranges/Happy's Van Breaks. It starts with the same old intro of Happy dancing, and then it cuts to Happy walking around the playground, with children at play. Then, Happy sees something to the right; two oranges sitting on a bench. Happy walks to the bench and says “Hey, who are you?” and the oranges said “We're the Oranges!” and Happy said “Well, I'm Happy Appy!” and the oranges screamed and ran off. Happy said “Every time...” and goes into his van.

Then, he goes to the Oranges' house in the middle of the night. The first Orange is watching TV, while the second Orange is reading a book. The second Orange said “Hey, James.” and James Orange says “What, John?” and John Orange said “Did you know that no words rhyme with Orange?” and James Orange says “Oh, really?” and then John Orange says “I'm going to go to bed.” and James Orange nods, and continues to watch TV.

Then, Happy Appy jumps into the roof of their house, with a orange peeler in his right hand. He whispers “Hey kids, let's go skin the Oranges!” and Happy climbs down the ladder to where John Orange is, and peels his skin. After that, he puts John Orange in a vise, and starts turning the crank, and John Orange gets squeezed and orange juice comes out of him, replacing blood. After that, James Orange knocks on the door, and Happy jumps into the ceiling. When James Orange opens the door and turns on the light, he sees John Orange's body, and screams.

Then, Happy Appy comes down from the ceiling, and peels and vises him in the same way as John Orange, and the episode ends.

The next episode was Happy's Van Breaks. It starts with the intro, and goes into the episode. Happy is healing a kid when he notices that his van's engine is billowing smoke. He runs to it and notices that a part of the van's engine is broken. Happy takes a mechanic's toolbox, and gets to work on the engine. When he works on the engine, a kids' soccer ball bounces on Happy's head. Angered, he gets a wrench, and off-screen, he kills the kid with the wrench. Then he goes back and repairs the engine, replaces the coolant, and changes the oil. Then, while healing more kids, we see a man break Happy's engine. Happy gets super annoyed, and runs after the man in a POV shot. Eventually, he captures him, and stabs the back of his head with a screwdriver, and the episode ends.

Finally, I saw the episode The Kids Are OK/Happy Happy Christmas. In The Kids Are OK, we find out what happened to Danny; he's still alive, and we find out what happened; Danny is the younger brother of Miranda, and he hates Happy because he killed his older sister. Most of the episode is of Happy trying to kill Danny, while posed as John Orange.

In Happy Happy Christmas, we see Happy drive to the playground in his van, but the van is all decked out in Christmas lights and decorations. Happy exits out the side door and says “MERRY CHRISTMAS, CHILDREN!” and gives presents to the children. We see one of the kids open his present, and it is a juice box. In fact, all of the presents are juice boxes. We see the children drink them, except for one kid; it was Danny! All of a sudden, we see all the children collapse. When I first saw this, I thought he had done a Jim Jones and put poison in the juice boxes. But then, Happy says “Looks like my knockout drink worked!” and we see Danny run away, and he looks at Happy taking all the kids to his van. Then we see Happy drive off, screaming “MERRY CHRISTMAS DANNY!” and Danny runs to the road, pulls out the Colt Python, and shoots the bumper of Happy's Van. Happy swerves, but keeps driving. Danny throws the gun on the ground and screams “DARN YOU HAPPY!” and the episode ends.

November 3rd, 2011Edit Welcome to part 2 of the Happy Appy Episode Watching posts.

I decided to start with the episode that contained “Miranda Lives”. The first episode, with a unreadable episode in the menu, had the title “Danny's Final” in the intro. However, the intro is different; it plays “The Final Countdown” by Europe while showing pictures of Danny fighting Happy Appy. Then it shows a clip of Happy dancing then Danny shooting, and then the clips fuse into one shot with V.S. in between.

The episode starts with Danny kissing one of the girls from the movie. He said “I love you, Jenny!”. Then it cuts to Happy dragging a body into his van. It turns out it's Miranda! Happy drives his van while the Psycho theme plays. Danny sees the van and flips the bird at him. Happy gets out and says “Greetings, bitch.” Danny takes out a katana, while Happy takes out his knife. They sword fight for a minute, then Danny flicks Happy's knife away with the katana.

Happy then grabs Danny's sword away and says “Now, let's see how much blood's in you” while Jenny screams. Happy thrusts the sword, but then he is stabbed by a quickly-moving being. It was Miranda! She says “Cheers.” and falls down. Danny then said “He's dead, forever.” Then the credits appear, and then it shows a title card saying “Epilogue”. The epilogue made this episode worse.

It started with Happy's body on the playground. A demonic voice that sounded like the voice in the first 6 seconds of “One Vision” by Queen started talking, and fog surrounded the playground. Then, Happy started levitating, but it was really a shadow man who was holding him up. It was Shaq, saying “Poor Happy, defeated by Danny. I will revive you, and we will kill Danny and Miranda.” Then the episode ends.

Then, Miranda Lives started playing. It starts out with a piano version of the song sung by 3 of the 5 original kindergarteners (but they were in first or second grade when the episode premiered). The intro showed clips from Happy and the Oranges, Happy Happy Christmas, Camp Aaah!, and two other episodes I hadn't seen yet. It began with Miranda chopping cow with a butcher knife in a butcher shop, while Down With A Sickness was playing (It was released on Halloween 2000, and this episode was released on December 27th, so it was sort of normal).

Happy sneaks in the butcher shop with a needle filled with acid and injects the acid in Miranda, before running off. The song stops and Miranda wakes up, picking up a knife and yelling for Happy, but there is no response. She looks around and Happy jumps down from behind and bites her leg. She chops the leaf off Happy's head. Happy screams very loudly, like a girl in pain, and stabs her in the eye with the needle. She fainted, and it looked like she had died, but she gets up and drives her thumb into Happy's back. Happy screams that same scream and spits some green acid on her face. Miranda falls down, but Danny runs in with a peeler and peels a part of Happy's face off and apple juice squirts out. Happy then chops part of Danny's shoe off with Miranda's knife. Danny then runs into a walk-in freezer, and Happy follows. Danny turns the temperature to -34 degrees Fahrenheit, and Happy freezes. Then the episode ends.

Then, I played the episode Lighter/Miranda Forever. Lighter was about Happy finding a lighter. It starts with the regular old intro, but with the acoustic version. Why the acoustic version? It then cuts to Happy walking on the playground. I have a question; if Happy kills a lot of children, why don't the children notice him instantly, or the parents? Happy then stops, and picks up a lighter. He says “Hey kids, look what Happy found!”

It then cuts to Happy turning on the lighter. He says “Today, we're going to learn about fire!”. Oh no. I know what was most likely going to happen; Happy burns down houses, sets children on fire, and most likely kills Danny. I then saw Happy stand next to a actual worm. He said “Fire can give people burns, and in some cases, can kill them, like this worm!” He then set the worm on fire, and you can see it's charred body. Happy then said “Magnifying glasses can set small insects on fire!” before walking over to a kid.

The kid didn't recognize him, and Happy turned on the lighter, and set the kid on fire. The kid tried to stop, drop, and roll, but it was too late. Happy then said “Let's go find a house to burn!” and Happy walks over to a house and burns it down. The rest of the episode is just Happy setting stuff on fire.

I then played Miranda Forever. It picked up at the end of Miranda Lives, where Danny was in the walk-in freezer with Happy's frozen body. You could see ice on Danny's face, due to the sweat freezing. He then screams to Miranda to open the door. Miranda wakes up, and slowly walks over to the freezer. Miranda tries opening the door, and the door doesn't open. Miranda then wonders; could a hammer break the handle?

Miranda tells Danny that she will get a sledgehammer to break open the door, and walks off. Danny then waits for a while, staring at Happy, wondering if he will come back from the dead and kill him. Then, Miranda hits the door handle with a sledgehammer, and breaks the handle, throwing open the door. Danny gets scared, and accidentally hits the thermostat to warm the freezer. Miranda gets Danny out of the room, and they both leave the Butcher Shop. However, the thermostat warms up Happy, and he manages to leave again. He says “Hey kids! Let's see how good Danny is holding in pain!” Then he gets a chunk of dry ice and puts it on Danny's arm, and he screams. Miranda turns around, but Happy isn't there, and the episode ends.

Then, I played Happy and the Blackberry, which was 2 minutes short of a normal episode of Happy Appy. It starts out with Danny, Jenny, Miranda, and a kid named Quincy talking in a meeting room dressed up. Miranda suggests to put another fruit out to kill Happy. Quincy suggests a Watermelon to crush Happy. Miranda suggests a tomato, Jenny suggests a pear, but Danny shouts “BLACKBERRY!” and a Blackberry appears, who's name is Derry Berry. He says “You owe me two ounces of dirt and a cup of water, Dan.” and Danny replies “Whatever, just kill the goddamn apple”. Derry runs toward Happy, who is putting medical tapes and cotton on a kid's bloody gash near his wrist on his arm. Happy turns around holding scissors and Derry runs into them. Happy says “Remember kids, always look where you're going, or you'll get a boo-boo!”. Derry pulls himself off the scissors and starts to eat Happy. After that, all that is left is an apple core, Derry explodes, and the episode ends.

Happy Lives starts out with the same intro. Happy just randomly sucks himself back together like in the movie, but this time, the effects were a bit better. Then Happy heals a kid using a Band-Aid, but then he says “Hey kids, wanna come have fun with me and Benny?”. They all come running into the van, but Benny leaves quickly and silently. Then it shows Happy with a hand grenade and he says “Wanna see a cool trick?”. Of course, the children shout yes, and the van explodes. The scene is kinda realistic, with body parts everywhere. Then, Happy polishes a toe, puts it in a jar, and puts it in a mysterious brown bag, which has been in the background since the Knife episode. Benny runs over to the group (Miranda, Danny, Jenny, and Quincy) who say “Hi, we're the Happy Hunters”. Benny then says “Can I join?” and the episode ends without credits.

November 4th, 2011Edit Welcome to the final post of the Happy Appy Season 2 and 3 posts.

Let's start with Red. It starts out with a new intro that is the intro to every Season 3 episode (except Happy Fest). The intro plays a rap version of the normal theme. It goes like this;

Yo, there's a apple who's a yapple who loves to help Then there's these kids that want him to go to hell Ooooh, Happy Appy, Aaaaaah, Happy Appy, HE LOVES TO HELP!

After that, it shows Happy in front of a dirty, broken-up mirror chanting “Satan, Satan” until Quincy breaks in, and Happy says “Hey Quincy cheeks, you doin' fine?”. Quincy then drops a cross onto Happy and Happy yells while burning. The episode ends with no credits. The entire episode (even with the intro) is 4 minutes long, the shortest episode ever.

Miranda Dies picks off 7 seconds before Miranda Forever ends. Danny falls on the ground choking on his saliva and Happy chucks a stake at him. Danny then gets out a match and kicks a bottle of wine down, and says “Rot in hell, whore head!”. Happy takes the lit match and throws it at Miranda. Miranda burns, while Danny shouts “No!”. She dies, and Danny gets angry. Danny picks up the bottle and smashes Happy over the head, knocking him back into Miranda's burning body. He melts, while Danny runs out of the Butcher Shop (which is ironically named the Miranda Donald Butcher Shop) and the credits roll.

Nuxik then played. It was actually called Happy Goes Bonkers instead of Nuxik. It starts out with a girl forming Happy into his normal shape, but drops tweezers next to Happy. Happy then gets the tweezers and stabs her with them. He goes into the butchering room and finds the cleaver stuck on the floor. Happy walks out, while Quincy is crying because Danny telling him the news of what happened to Miranda and the girl. Then Happy hides, while Danny walks inside, gets a pistol, and goes outside. He sees Happy and he says “I've killed your friend and your older sister. Now it's time for you to go bye-bye!” but Danny shoots Happy's cleaver out of his hand, and Happy gets frightened by it, so he runs off while Quincy says “Yeah! That's how we do it in my neighborhood!”. Quincy walks into the house and the credits roll.

Meaner picks right off after Happy Goes Bonkers. Happy is in his van polishing his cleaver and cleaning the body parts of children. The corpse of the girl he stabbed with the tweezers wakes up, and both the girl and Happy scream. Happy injects the girl with the knockout fluid and proceeds to mutilate her off screen. After Happy is done, he chops the girl's head off with the cleaver. Happy leaves his van and says “That was fun! Hey kids, killing is a fun thing to do! You can do it at home if your mommy and daddy allow you to!” and the credits roll.

Happy 2; Revenge starts out with no intro, it just cuts to Happy driving a new van, which was black instead of white. He goes to the playground, but unlike regular times, where he kills the kids when he exits or does a half Jim Jones, he just wanders around the playground, before healing one kid. Then, we see a flashback; someone hypnotized Happy to heal kids like he used to before he killed them. Then, while healing a kid, he notices the man who hypnotized him. He stops healing the kid, picks up a broken beer bottle, and says "Hey kids, when a mysterious man hypnotizes you, fight him off!" and kills him off-screen, and he walks back into frame with his dismembered foot and stares at the camera until the credits roll. In Jar of Hate, Happy is sitting in his van, when he says "Hello kids! Want to see my jar of hate?" and a kid walks up to him and says "Happy, hate is a strong word!" and Happy says "Shoo, Jacob!" and pushes him off, writes his name down, and puts it in a jar of names. Happy then says "My jar of hate contains all of the people I will kill! Let's see who's in the jar!" He empties the jar, and picks out four names. Happy says "The people I will kill are Jacob, Quincy, Jenny, and Danny!" Then he sneaks behind Jacob with the broken beer bottle, jumps behind him, and the credits roll, while you can hear Jacob being killed in the background. In Happy 3: Rose of Blood 'n Bones, we see Happy painting a picture with red paint. The picture is of a rose in a playground. It was innocent enough, until we see Happy run out of red paint. He says "Darn! Hey kids, let's go find some red paint, and white sticks!" We see Happy lure a kid into his van, and we see him mutilate him off screen. It then cuts to Happy painting the same picture, but we now see him with more red paint (blood) and bones as the stalk of the rose. After a minute, he is done. He shows the final result, and says "My masterpiece is complete. I call it "Rose of Blood and Bones". Hey kids, you can make a painting using body parts and blood! If you make one, send it in to me and I will give you a prize!" and a address was listed. I know where I'm going soon.

In Can of Kill, we see Happy cleaning out some big tin cans, and working on mechanics. Happy notices the camera, and says "Hey kids, I'm working on my can of kill!" and goes back to working on the can. Finally, we see a tin can that has the note "OPEN ME!" on it. Happy comes from the left and says "Whenever someone opens the can of kill, a spray bottle pops out, and sprays the kid with poison! This is my best invention, and it should get me a Nobel Prize for peace!". While he is talking his mouth off, we see Quincy open the can, and he gets hit with poison and dies. Happy then notices Quincy's body and says "Hey, it works! You too can make a can of kill! All you need to do is send 5 dollars to this address, and you can kill anyone that hates you!" and the same address was listed. Before the credits, Happy takes Quincy's body to the van. Why were the recent episodes giving me an address?

Finally, the final (full) episode of Happy Appy was up. I could predict what was going to happen; Happy was going to kill Jenny in Happy Fest, and in Happy Rots in Hell, Danny kills Happy once and for all, while sacrificing his life for him as well. I was sort of right.

In Happy Fest, we see Happy discuss plans in the camera, which looks like the scene from The Dark Knight when the Joker held the camera to his face on the TV. He says "Hey kids! I have a idea that will change the world! I will make everyone happy!" and brings out a knife. I knew what he was going to do. He was going to carve smiles into people's mouths. He got out of his van, and said "Hey kids! Who wants to smile, even when they're sad?" and all the children (only 5) come running into Happy's van. Then, Happy locks the doors, does a death stare and smile, holds up a knife, and we see the outside of the van, where children are screaming and Happy laughing. After that, Happy opens the van door and climbs out. In the background, you could see a kid's body who's mouth had been stretched like Kuchisake-onna, but in a smile. Happy then says "If you make everyone smile, the entire world will be a better place!" and the credits roll.

Finally, the episode Happy Rots in Hell. This is the longest episode (minus the movie) at 45 minutes. I think this is my favorite episode, you'll see why.

In Happy Rots in Hell, Happy drives to a old house where Jenny and Danny are. Danny has Happy's knife with him, while Jenny has a shank. Happy peeks through the door, and notices that there is a shotgun trap, rigged to fire at him when the door (which you have to open by pushing from the outside, as well as pushing from the inside) would open. Happy then goes into the window, closes it, and deactivates the shotgun trap, and takes the shotgun with him. Happy runs upstairs, screaming "Danny, Jenny, guess who's going to make you SMILE?" and no response is heard. He says "Let's play hide and go seek! If I find you, you will get killed by me!" and no response. Happy started to count to 10, and it cut to Jenny and Danny in the bathtub. Jenny said "Danny, I'm going to back-stab Happy." and Danny says "Sure, but make sure you knock him into the spear on the end of the staircase to paralyze him". While Happy was at 3, Jenny was running at him from the hall. Happy heard her footsteps, said "456789...10! Found you!", brings out his shotgun, and shoots Jenny in the chest, while Danny screams no. Happy then looks up at Danny and says "Found you too! I always win at hide and go seek!" and a intermission happened.

After the intermission, Danny then closes and locks the bathroom door, and puts the mirror on the door so Happy can't get into the room quicker. Happy says "Aww, Danny! You know there's a chainsaw in the house!" and Happy runs off. Danny feels a lot more safer, but tries to find a way out of the bathroom. He moves the bathtub, looks under the sink, and even removes the toilet tank. Then, Happy revved up a chainsaw, and Danny fell back, accidentally hitting a mop. The mop fell over, and a trapdoor opened. Danny jumped in and closed it. After Happy cut the door in half, he opened it, and said "Danny? Where are you? Did you open the window and jump out of it?" before realizing the trapdoor. He says "Hey, I know where you hid!" and chainsaws the trapdoor. Fortunately for Danny, he was already in the basement long before Happy threw open the trapdoor. Happy runs in the tunnel and says "Danny! You will smile, or else I will have to end your life!" and Danny says "Over here, Happy!" and Happy runs into the basement. He notices it's empty, and says "Where the hell are you?"

Danny then appears, but with a buzz-saw, a katana, and the knife. He says "Bring it on" as he revs up the buzz-saw. Happy then grabs one of the blades and throws it at Danny. It misses him and sticks to the wall, but cuts off a piece of his hair. Danny then goes towards Happy with the buzz-saw, but Happy gets a pipe and defends himself against Danny. Happy then gets the advantage, and hits Danny in the shoulder with it, and breaks his shoulder blade. He then gets the katana out and tries to stab Happy, but Happy uses his chainsaw and breaks the blade. Finally, Danny throws the knife, and Happy dodges it. Happy then takes the katana and knife, and looks quite stupid with all the weapons on him. Danny then crawls away from him towards his buzz-saw, while Happy comes closer. Then, Danny takes out the saw blade and throws it at Happy. The saw manages to cut his cheek, apple juice coming out, and flies into a gas pipe, and gas sprays everywhere. While Happy is too busy trying to plug up the gas pipe, Danny finds matches on a barrel. Happy then notices that Danny has the matches, and picks up the katana, and comes closer to him, saying "You wouldn't dare. You wouldn't fucking dare." and Danny says "Oh yes, I dare" and lights a match.

Happy then thrusts the sword into Danny, and Danny dies, but drops the match on gas, which ignites all the gas, burning Happy and Danny. Happy then notices that there are some explosive chemicals to the side. He says "Oh shit" before it cuts to the house, where it collapses, due to the foundations being blown by the explosive chemicals. We then see a camera pan to the destroyed basement, where Happy's melted, crushed body lays. It then rolls to the credits, showing the people who died, which had over 50 people, including Miranda, Quincy, Jenny, Danny, and Happy. Finally, I played the Epilogue.

It starts out with someone playing Gloomy Sunday by Rezső Seress, while it shows clips from all the episodes in its intro, albeit in black and white. It then cuts to a man typing on a typewriter on his desk (with a subtitle that says "Played by an actor"), with the crushed puppet at its side. It seems to be a paper about Happy Appy. A narrator talks;

"It looks like the evil rampage of Happy Appy has came to a close. Although he had died, his unfortunate impact on the world lives on. The many people who died on that show did it so the sick man who directed the show could see his true vision; a true snuff TV show. Where the director is, I have no idea, but I think everybody would like to think that he died in a gruesome way. However, I have to give my thanks to Ray Bollia, the person who played Danny, because he had killed that sick apple. I also have to give my thanks to the other three people who tried to kill Happy."

But the man turns his face. On his shirt is the director's name.

"You'd think he had died. But, although Happy is long dead, the director lives on, and somewhere in the world, he is making private home movies, which continue the horrible story of Happy Appy. Though you might be wondering one thing; why did Happy Appy go so bad? We might never know until the director comes out and reveals why he made Happy kill all these people."

We see the director slowly fix Happy's puppet with clay model utensils.

"Somewhere in the world, the director is slowly rebuilding Happy's clay model, damaged in the series finale of Happy Appy. And if the director rebuilds Happy's clay model, who knows who might be killed next. It could be a celebrity's child. It could be the president's child. It could be any child. We can only say two things; the director is alive, and he might be killing someone. I hope someone will kill the director."

It then cuts to Happy's rebuilt model. The director adds a knife, it cuts to black, and a scream is heard.

"I hope someone will kill Shaq."

The credits rolled. And now I knew who Shaq is. He is the director who made this show, Shaquille O' Neal. You might be wondering; if Shaq was a nickname I made, then why did the prologue call him the nickname? You see, I didn't make Shaq's name. On the day I gave Shaq his name, before the post, I got a scrap of paper that just said "I'm Shaq". Obviously, since I had to call the figure something, I called him Shaq. Only recently did I find out his nickname is actually Shaq, and that the scrap was a hundred percent fact. Oh, and I remade the episode list. I guessed on where Hospital Doctor was (it's not Happy the Doctor) Season 1

Happy's Vacation/Hurt Happy The Monkey Bar Injury/Happy Goes to School ???/Nate Needs Help Never Run with Knives/Happy Fixes Kids Happy Fixes Kids, Part 2/Happy Fixes Kids, Part 3 The Two Towers/Happy the Doctor ???/Mean Miranda Happy's Trick/Hospital Doctor (?) The Happy Appy Movie Season 2

Happy Meets the Rhubears/Camp Aaah! Happy and the Oranges/Happy's Van Breaks The Kids are OK/Happy Happy Christmas Danny's Final/Miranda Lives Lighter/Miranda Forever Happy and the Blackberry/Happy Lives Season 3

Red/Miranda Dies Happy Goes Bonkers (Nuxik)/Meaner Happy 2: Revenge/Jar of Hate Happy 3: Rose of Blood 'n Bones/Can of Kill Happy Fest/Happy Rots in Hell Epilogue November 5th, 2011Edit Today, I found Shaq (who I will now call Shaquille) on my front lawn cutting down a tree with an ax. I went outside and shot Shaquille with the shotgun and then tied him to the same tree (He hadn't cut it all the way). I got buzz saw blades (it's not supposed to be a reference to Happy Rots in Hell, okay?), attached them to the front of my car, got in the car, and rammed the car into Shaquille. I backed up and rammed into him again before getting out of the car. I then threw him in the fireplace. I then went outside, and right in front of the tree where Shaq was killed, he left Happy's puppet, so I threw it in with his body. I finally did it. I killed Shaquille. But I have doubts.

November 6th, 2011Edit I'm planning to go where Shaq is on the 8th. How do I know where Shaq is? Well, you know the address in Happy 3: Rose of Blood 'n Bones/Can of Kill? Well, Shaq might be hiding there. How is Shaq still alive? I just recently saw him, but this time, the filters of his gas mask were missing, and you could see scarred skin (to the best of my observation).

November 9th, 2011Edit This post will be the absolute final post to this blog. The sad thing is that I left many questions unanswered. However, the blog post will (or might) answer some of them, which relate to Shaq/Shaquille.

First, I must talk about the trip to the address, and what happened. Since I live in the suburbs of Chicago, and the address was near Alma, Colorado, I decided to take a car ride, but I took some things; a photo of Shaquille O'Neal, just in case the Shaq I find is the true one. I also took some weapons, like the switchblade, the shotgun, and a katana. After driving for 12 hours (I woke up at 7:00 A.M.), resting at a motel, and driving for 6 more hours, I reached Alma, Colorado. The address, which I will not reveal for people's safety, was over 5 miles out of Alma. I decided to drive over to the address, and there it was.

It was a fancy abandoned house, sort of like the one in Happy Rots in Hell. In fact, it was the same house, albeit with a spraypainted sign that said “Happy Appy Fun-house!!!!”. Why was the house rebuilt, I didn't know how. To make sure Shaq didn't trap the front door, I peeked inside. Sure enough, there was yet another gun trap, but it wasn't the kind of shotgun that was used in Happy Rots in Hell. No, it was a Winchester. I decided to sneak in the window, but Shaq locked the window, so I had no choice but to shoot out the window. I then climbed in, making sure to not be cut by any glass. After that, I disarmed the trap, and took the Winchester.

The house was completely abandoned, and all lights were off, save for the room where the window was. I looked for the light switch, but noticed parts of the floor was wet, which, for me, meant one of two things; there was a water spill, or there was blood on the floor. I ran to the light switch, and tried to turn the light on, but there was no power on, so I headed for the circuit breaker. Sure enough, the circuit breaker only had one room with power, so I flicked all the switches, and the lights turned on. I then went back to the staircase room, which had the light switch off, and I flicked it on. There was some blood on the carpet and floor of the staircase room. I then said “Hey, Shaq! I know you're here, and I turned the power on for every room in this house. Now you can't hide in the shadows!”

There was no response, which I knew was going to happen. Then, I screamed “HEY, SHAQUILLE O'NEAL! I KNOW YOU'RE SHAQ!” and no response. I then went upstairs, and wondered something; would I see Jenny and Danny's bodies if I look hard enough? So, I went up to where Jenny was shot. I then noticed there was no body or bones where she was shot; only a blood stain. Then;

“Gerasim, guess who's here?”

I then froze instantly. It was Shaquille on the other side of the hallway. I then responded. “Are you going to run away from me this time?” and he said “Now, why would I do that? You know I'd never run away!” and I responded with “LISTEN, SHAQUILLE! How do you keep coming back?”. No response, and then Shaquille said “I have some people that work with me, who posed as me, so you couldn't kill me.” and then snapped back with “But anyways, how did you get here?” and I said “There was a address listed in two episodes of Season 3, and I went to it.” and Shaquille said “Ah, looks like I shouldn't have put that address in. Would have made your search more fun...for me!”.

Then, I said “Anyways, Shaquille, you're going to die right now.” and Shaquille said “Catch me first!” and jumped into the attic. I knew what was going to happen; at a random time, he might jump down from the attic and claw my insides out. I then had an idea; I would take the same path Danny used to kill Happy Appy. I pushed the mop switch, yet no trap door opened. I then stomped on it, and it opened, and I slid in the tunnel. I then heard Shaquille come down from the attic, and land on the floor, before saying “I know where you're going! You're using the bathroom tunnel!” and I had to run to the cellar.

After running a hundred or so feet, I heard Shaquille opening the trap door, but luckily, I reached the cellar. The cellar, unlike the rest of the house, was burned out and had buzz saw blades on the wall, with one being lodged into the gas pipe. I then took all of the buzz saw blades out of the walls, and brung out the switchblade, katana, and shotgun. Shaquille then entered the cellar, and said “Oh look, this reminds me of Happy Rots in Hell, which you will be doing!” I then threw one of the buzz saw blades at Shaquille, and he jumped out of the way. He said “You really expected me to get hit that easily?” and then grabbed the buzz saw and threw it at me, at a faster speed then I could throw. I dodged it, and fired the shotgun at him. He got hit, but then got a icepick from the ground.

He then charged at me, but then I reloaded and fired at his leg. He fell, but managed to get the shotgun out of my hand. Unfortunately for him, I had no more ammo left for the Winchester. He then hit me in the shin with the handle, and I tripped. I then got the katana and tried to chop him up. He then got up, grabbed the ice pick, and swung it at me. I got out of the way, and made him hit the same gas pipe, but no gas came out. I then sat down because of my wounds. Then, Shaquille pulled out one of the thinner pipes, and was ready to hit me, when I realized the buzz saw was next to me. I got it, revved it up, and sawed his leg off, and blood came out, which made me know that it wasn't a prosthetic leg. Shaquille screamed in pain and dropped the pipe. I then got the pipe, and started beating him up with it. After a few minutes of hitting him, he stopped breathing. I then checked his pulse. Nothing. Not even a beat. I sighed in relief, but I still had to check his face, to make sure he was the actual Shaq, so I didn't have to fight him yet again. I took off his mask, and took out the picture. It was an exact match; Shaq was Shaquille O'Neal, and now that I had killed him, I felt much more safer.

After burning Shaq's body, I left the house, got in my car, and drove off to my Chicago home.

Well, this is it. I can't believe I have to stop posting on the blog, but I must stop posting on Happy Appy, because I pretty much did everything related to the show. I watched Seasons 1, 2, and 3, killed Shaquille/Shaq, played the Happy Appy Game, and even went to the studios. However, that does not mean that the search for answers is over. If you look hard enough, you can find the answers to the unexplained questions that relate to Happy Appy. Now, you might be wondering two things; What will I do, and what do I regret when I quit posting on Happy Appy.

Well, to be honest, I will actually open up another blog, which will be a short-lived one that talks about Fright House Screamers. Remember that? What do I regret when I quit posting on this blog? Well, I regret that I could have made a longer post on Happy Appy and the Golden Apple's finished form. However, since I just want to never see Happy Appy again, I don't have any regrets. I'm sorry for leaving this blog, but I must part ways for now.

See you soon,

Gerasim Yakovlev

P.S. What happened to Miranda, Quincy, Jenny, and Danny, you ask? Well, I have answers for once!

Miranda – Died in 2006 at the age of 22 (which would have made her 15-16 when Mean Miranda aired)

Quincy – Died in 2006 (what's with that year?) at the age of 15.

Jenny – Unknown fate, possibly dead.

Danny (Ray Bollia) – Still alive. He was seven during the first episode starring him (in 1999) and would be 19 right now.