Talk:Sesame Street "Crack Master" Short from Episode 818 (1975)/@comment-79.16.114.89-20140718105211/@comment-24525827-20141130001737

>I was only 3 years old

>I loved Barney so much, I had all the merchandise and movies

>I pray to Barney every night before bed, thanking him for the life I've been given.

>"Barney is love" I say; "Barney is life"

>My dad hears me and calls me a (CENSORED)

>I know he was just jealous of my devotion for Barney

>I called him a (CENSORED)

>He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep

>I'm crying now, and my face hurts

>I lay in bed and it's really cold

>Suddenly, a warmth is moving towards me

>And also dinosaur feet stomping

>It's Barney

>I am so happy

>He whispers into my ear "Stuuuuuuuuuuuupendous!

> <span style="color:rgb(128,0,0);font-family:arial,helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13px;">He grabs me with his powerful dino hands and puts me down onto my hands and knees <span style="color:rgb(128,0,0);font-family:arial,helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:normal;">>I'm ready

<span style="color:rgb(128,0,0);font-family:arial,helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:normal;">>I spread my (CENSORED)-cheeks for Barney

<span style="color:rgb(128,0,0);font-family:arial,helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:normal;">>His tail... ugh, it's too gross to talk about.

<span style="color:rgb(128,0,0);font-family:arial,helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:normal;">>It hurts so much but I do it for Barney

<span style="color:rgb(128,0,0);font-family:arial,helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:normal;">>I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water

<span style="color:rgb(128,0,0);font-family:arial,helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:normal;">>I push against his force

<span style="color:rgb(128,0,0);font-family:arial,helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:normal;">> <span style="color:rgb(128,0,0);font-family:arial,helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:normal;">I want to please Barney

<span style="color:rgb(128,0,0);font-family:arial,helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:normal;">>He shouts "I love you, you love me" as he fills my butt with his love

<span style="color:rgb(128,0,0);font-family:arial,helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:normal;">>My dad walks in <span style="color:rgb(128,0,0);font-family:arial,helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:normal;">>Barney looks him straight in the eyes and says "See you next time!"

<span style="color:rgb(128,0,0);font-family:arial,helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:normal;">>Barney leaves through the hole where my window and wall once were. I mean, he is a dinosaur after all.

<span style="color:rgb(128,0,0);font-family:arial,helvetica,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:normal;">>Barney is love. Barney is life.

Cheese E. Chuck: NOW CUT THAT OUT!

Scarecrow: